Table 4 Three
Welcome to the table where you will dine on three unprofessional opinions for the night. Table For Three is meant to be a light-hearted space that talks about everyday events from the perspective of three regular ass people. We look to bring humor to our topics...think of us like the comment section on TikTok. Now, things can get messy at the table as we all know, so come prepared with a bib.
Table 4 Three
Episode 15: Herro! Welcome to the Christmas Table!
Holiday shopping rarely goes to plan—especially when “get something for the kids” turns into “also, I bought myself sneakers.” We open with the honest math of gifting grown children, the pain of Lego pricing, and why cash plus a clear conscience might be the most adult move of the season. From there, we veer into delightfully absurd and uncomfortably real territory: a one-man dating app that strips away competition, a cliff-pact logic puzzle about trust, and headlines that push every button—rabies via organ donation and a funeral home allegedly giving a grieving father a bag of brains instead of clothing.
Beneath the jokes, there’s a throughline: systems either protect people or they don’t. We dig into rare neurological twists like foreign accent syndrome, then draw a sharp contrast between Japan’s fresh, cooked-daily school lunches and America’s processed cafeteria model. The difference isn’t just culture—it’s policy and priorities, with childhood obesity rates to match. If we can design an efficient vending contract, we can design a menu that nourishes growing brains.
We also take a hard look at parenting and consequences through a “scared straight” story that ends in tragedy. Intent collides with a system unfit to keep a minor safe, and the result is devastating. That conversation isn’t about blame; it’s about building interventions that work—therapy, mentoring, structured programs—and custody protocols that never put teens in harm’s way. We close with fantasy football highs and heartbreaks, because even in December, the waiver wire giveth and taketh away.
Come for the laughs, stay for the questions that linger: What do we owe our kids—money, time, advocacy, or better systems? Press play, then tell us where you stand. If this episode made you think or smile, follow the show, share it with a friend, and drop a review so more people find a seat at the table.
With your support Table 4 Three can improve. We are looking for donations to reach our goal of a thousand dollars. But let's make this fun!!! Whenever someone donates $10 or more, they will receive a shoutout on our next episode. The person who has the highest donation can choose which Table 4 Three member gets a pie to the face...to which will be aired on our first video podcast. As always, we love and appreciate your support.
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Welcome to the table. The opinions of this podcast are for entertainment purposes only. Our thoughts and views are not to be taken personally.
SPEAKER_15:It is not that serious. We are trained professionals at being regular ass people. If you can't take what we serve in, this is not the table for you. Reservation denied.
SPEAKER_02:Enjoy the show. Enjoy it. It is about that time, ladies and gentlemen. Tomorrow. It's Christmas.
SPEAKER_12:And I hope y'all got all y'all Christmas shoppings done.
SPEAKER_05:Probably not.
SPEAKER_02:Got young kids. I know you out there. Shopping should be easy, but hopefully you ordered it early. And Bezai can't order it. Send it to you until after Christmas. Hopefully you got it in early. Welcome back to the table, ladies and gentlemen. And Merry Christmas. You already know we had a ticket in.
SPEAKER_12:Take it away, Mary. I mean, Mariah.
SPEAKER_06:Wow.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_08:Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Prospero año y felicidad. Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Prospero Ano y Feliz Night.
SPEAKER_10:I want to wish you a Merry Christmas. I want to wish you a Merry Christmas.
SPEAKER_13:Oh my God.
SPEAKER_12:We are in the season.
SPEAKER_13:Now the jingle pop has begun.
SPEAKER_02:Alright. Jingle bell time the gift that you're looking for.
SPEAKER_13:Jingle bell time.
SPEAKER_02:Or you might be the present. Or you might be the past.
SPEAKER_13:In the frosty air. It is the colour season. Nice snowfall. The gold black snug it up with the white piece. Jingle round the clock. Mix and a mingle in the jingle and feet. That's the jingle bell haride.
SPEAKER_15:Jingle my way, Sailor.
SPEAKER_05:Jingle, jungle, jungle, jungle, jungle, jungle, jingle jungle.
SPEAKER_15:Alright. Jingle, jingle, jingle all the way.
SPEAKER_02:Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to the table for three. Um man, it is Christmas. Tomorrow is Christmas. Mericrima. Feliz Navidad. Whatever. I don't know if I can roll the D. Oh wow. My wife is good at rolling the D. Um if you if you're new to the show, I am Mr.
SPEAKER_15:I am Nasty Claus, that womenini. And I am Mike's Heart Lemonade. Also known as Sean Anthony.
SPEAKER_02:Hey, yo.
SPEAKER_14:What flavor?
SPEAKER_02:Original. Welcome back to the table. Um listen, it is the holidays. Um anybody got any vacation coming up? You probably do, because you're a little bit vacation. Oh, I do. What a lead-in. Right? I'm on vacation. My vacation starts today. Uh after New Year's Eve, uh, I got Christmas off, and I'm not going back to work until the 5th of January. So for me. My vacation starts next week. Yeah? Yeah. And Department? I'm on it. Oh, oh yeah, you're on it? On vacation. Oh, oh, okay.
SPEAKER_15:What else would he be on?
SPEAKER_02:You already know what he be on.
SPEAKER_15:No, I just want to be on a small rocket ship.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. See how you see how offended he got? Anyway.
SPEAKER_15:Pass it through the sky. Line style.
SPEAKER_02:Did everybody get their uh I did everybody do their shopping early and got what they needed to get or as much as you're gonna get for this year? What shopping?
SPEAKER_15:Now I got a little something to do today before the day's over.
SPEAKER_02:I got a little something to do too.
SPEAKER_15:You could call me a super last minute person.
SPEAKER_02:Well, I got I got my I got I got people some stuff. It's not my kid's grown, so it's like fucking. Do you find it easier since they're grown or hard? Yeah, I just give them money and get out my face. Like, you know, here, here's a gift card. Can I be your kid?
SPEAKER_15:You know what's crazy that I realized have enough.
SPEAKER_02:Oh shit. Just playing around. Yeah, we're just gonna go past that.
SPEAKER_15:Um no. You know what I realized though?
SPEAKER_02:When you think about it, it's not snow, ladies and gentlemen. Oh, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_15:When you really think about it, older kids are more expensive than younger kids. Although the amount of gifts is less than what it was when they were children. Oh, you because the type of gifts you mean? Right. So, like, like you said, mister, you getting your kids gift cards, but that would would you not giving them$25 gift cards? Like you're giving who said no, he said, don't count my pocket. They be lucky to get 15. I'm just saying, like, you know, when you really think about it. Like the older kids are more expensive than you know, yeah, to a degree. Because I mean, my my my son. I mean, you're actually right. My son, he was like, he wanted like a MacBook Pro, and I'm looking at him like, get a job. Shit.
SPEAKER_02:But nowadays, I mean, like, look at the price of fucking Legos. They're the price of a MacBook Pro. Yeah, for real. That's that is crazy. That is true. It's wild. And I want to get Legos for myself.
SPEAKER_15:They're so expensive. They're expensive too. That's why. Because adults play with them. Yeah. I mean, they're the only reason why they hike the prices up like that.
SPEAKER_02:They in our era, all the good toys and cartoons and all shit, all that shit came through in our era, right? So it's like those toys and Legos and all them things that used to just be like fit five dollars back when we were kids, as we grew up and still love to play with these things, they bumped the price up. Yeah. Like y'all adults now, y'all pay adult money for it. And then it sucks for the younger kids because now we ain't gonna get it for them because they don't take care of it or or you know, you know, right type of stuff.
SPEAKER_15:But really, if you like really, really think about it, Half and Kids really ain't thinking about it like that though. Like some of these kids still look at little tinker toys and have a ball with that. Like, remember, I know my kids were small, and we used to get them gifts, and they play with the boxes that the gifts came in more than they played with the actual damn toys. It was like, uh what?
SPEAKER_02:Wait, what? Your kids play with the boxes?
SPEAKER_15:Yeah, because you know, you be imagined, you use the imagination. They make little forts and shit out of it and all that stuff. So it's like, yeah. Not just like, oh, this box is great. No, not like that. My kids ain't sponsored. Don't do that.
SPEAKER_13:I'm just saying, like it I pick stuff up and put stuff down, mama.
SPEAKER_15:Like if it's a big box, they inside of it just like and then it's a car.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, if it's a big box, yeah, like not that's a concentration camp on Christmas. It's like a baby. Locked up.
SPEAKER_15:Like, Bobby.
SPEAKER_02:I mean, I can understand, like when I was young, I used to kind of just play with everything because you had nothing.
SPEAKER_15:I know how that just registered.
SPEAKER_03:You caught that right off the backboard.
SPEAKER_04:It's like, ooh, ooh, dick. Wow.
SPEAKER_02:But yeah, I mean, I we didn't have like phones and shit to keep our interest. So imagination is pretty much all we had. Um, now these kids is like, you know, you give them something they like, they probably mess with it. Like when my kids was little, they play with it a little bit and then they go off. And then go to the next. Yeah, it's like their attention span is not even that long. So I have to say, I am thankful that my kids don't require much, and I don't really have to spend much money on them. They're just thankful for being home. Yeah. I mean, swimming in acid.
SPEAKER_14:He said you got gut issues.
SPEAKER_03:They got a never-ending pool to swim in.
SPEAKER_15:Oh, you're a wild guy.
SPEAKER_13:And welcome back to the table.
SPEAKER_15:You're a wild guy. Yo, that is a wolf. I mean, if they're never mind. Go ahead, finish that. I was gonna say, is it really the table for three?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, there's a table for 18 million. That's so inappropriate. Charles speaks for a lot of people. In many language. Oh, you got culture. Your culture.
SPEAKER_15:Your culture. I'm shutting up because that all right was crazy. Yeah, I know. All right.
SPEAKER_02:He's gonna tag us both back. Oh my god. Both back. Shalom. Shalom. Anyway. You got the languages. What else I was gonna say? Uh I don't think you should say it. No, I don't got any stories. You always go. Oh, I I did go Christmas shopping. Did you? I did. Um, I bought myself a lot of stuff. Oh my god. Did you really? Mostly sneakers, because I got the gammas, I got the Jordan 11 Gamas, and I got the Jordan 8s. My wife don't know about the Jordan 8 yet. Wait, so let me let me ask this.
SPEAKER_15:That said.
SPEAKER_02:All the Christmas shopping you did for yourself, did you tackle the Christmas shopping for the people you were going to buy for you? Yeah, I did that early.
SPEAKER_14:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_02:I did that early.
SPEAKER_14:I don't believe them.
SPEAKER_02:My wife was like, hey, I got all the stuff in the cart. Can you put it on your thing? I was like, Alright, cool. Then I was like, I'm gonna buy myself some stuff. So I bought some stuff for my car and some sneakers. Okay. Okay. I'm gonna pack I'ma wrap them up and and have it like to me from Sienna. From Santa Assumption. I don't know. Yeah. From Jamal. From Jamal Christ. Anyway. I mean, is it is it okay to do that though? What? Self-love? I bought myself Christmas gifts. Is that really? Yeah. Yeah. It's not a when your kids older, you kind of get them the necessaries.
SPEAKER_15:It doesn't matter either way. If you buy your kids something, you can still buy yourself something. When you just like fuck them kids and buy yourself something.
SPEAKER_02:But no, I've I've done that before. Uh see, and then I think me and my wife got like an understanding is like your gift coming after Christmas. Like, yeah. It's at this point. Sorry, I got sneakers. No, no, but her gift is is gonna be much more expensive, so it has to wait a little bit. So every kiss begins with K. Oh no, it's not that type of damn. No, it's something that she really wants, though. A dildo. Three of them, but nah, that's she got those. Three.
SPEAKER_15:Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_02:She got those. All in one.
SPEAKER_15:Like it's what kind she got, let me know.
SPEAKER_02:It's the double-headed one and then look how you about to break it down. The details. Moving on.
SPEAKER_15:You know what I've always wanted? I probably uh satisfaction.
SPEAKER_02:I don't get no, that's not how the song go. No, it's just created his own.
SPEAKER_13:Satisfaction. It was like, I don't get one.
SPEAKER_15:You know, never mind.
SPEAKER_13:What?
SPEAKER_15:No, we want to know. No. So do our plus ones. Yeah, I'm sure they do.
SPEAKER_02:No, go ahead.
SPEAKER_15:No, it's it's it's it's come on, it's the holidays.
SPEAKER_02:You never know. You never know. You never know what kind of fans you got out there. I know. I mean, put it all on the table.
SPEAKER_14:No.
SPEAKER_02:They want they chose you to pie me. We still gotta pie you. Yeah, I know. You have you yeah, you still gotta pie. You need to be pie. Well.
SPEAKER_15:You need to be pie. Well no, but what gives you? You're gonna get pie. No, I'm not gonna say what I get for you. Oh, God. Anyway. Yeah, let's move on. I'm not gonna say it. Alright. That's too freaky for our audience.
SPEAKER_02:Oh. She wants her butthole whistled in.
unknown:What?
SPEAKER_02:Why would I want that with that?
SPEAKER_15:Why would I want that when my ass can whistle on its own? Why is it whistle? Wait. Is that a good thing? Is it supposed to do that? That's talent.
SPEAKER_02:Oh.
SPEAKER_15:Is it a whistle or more like an echo? Like a home. No, it's a whistle. There's no echo there.
SPEAKER_02:It's like smuss, muzz, muzz, uh.
SPEAKER_15:No, that's pretty sealed up.
SPEAKER_05:Not sealed.
SPEAKER_02:I mean, I mean, I got the area 51. Oh my god. This bitch ass is the Vatican. You need a key card. You need a key card. No, I should need a five.
SPEAKER_15:Is that what it sounds like?
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:That's your whistle?
SPEAKER_15:No, that was the key while.
SPEAKER_02:Anyway. What's going on in this crazy world of ours?
SPEAKER_14:Outside of my ass.
SPEAKER_04:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_02:So interesting story. There is a gentleman by the name of Aaron Smith, 31-year-old from North Carolina. And he has launched the dating world by storm. Not really. So he created an app not really. Called Singularity. And he says it's after he got tired of fighting for attention on the traditional dating apps. So his solution was to create his own and he removed all his rivals. So women who sign up, they only see different versions of him. So there's new photos. I gotta say. So every time they swipe, it's just a different photo of him, a different profile. Um but he said originally it kind of started like a joke, and then it kind of just took off. Um, but he was like, Look, there's no algorithms, there's no competition, just me. So um genius. Yeah, and he was gonna say, yeah, I I mean that's smart.
SPEAKER_15:That's yeah, yeah. It's funny though. It is funny, but it's smart. I mean, you can't be mad at that. Right. Because you know, even if he was to keep it up as a joke, I'm sure there's mad women that's gonna be. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, you know it. Right. Somebody's gonna click like that's the only option. And somebody might be his cup of tea.
SPEAKER_15:So he might get a lot of cup of teas. Mm-hmm. I know it's just him. He might get a lot of whistles. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_02:Air look sounded like it's sucked back in.
SPEAKER_15:That's what it does. That's why I said, why would I need somebody to blow in it?
SPEAKER_13:She was like, I can do it myself. I don't need you. Singularity.
SPEAKER_02:Now, what'd be funny is if somebody got the app and went on there created their profile and they were someone else. They created multiple profiles with different pictures with different pictures.
SPEAKER_15:I mean, like, the match made of heaven. And it's the match made of heaven right there. They perfect for each other. Right? Can't argue with it. Same humor, same everything. You are the daddy.
SPEAKER_02:Now, Nene, I mean if you look at his picture, would you s would you would you uh consider a date? I mean, I this used to be a type. No, that never was my type.
SPEAKER_15:Is he he's what? He's what? His last name is Smith. Oh. Oh. Yeah, that's not my type. Oh but he's not ugly. But that face, if that was the face, or the ass.
SPEAKER_02:He's not getting a swipe. I'm hoping that he didn't use that picture.
SPEAKER_15:Or that shirt. But um, he's not ugly. What's wrong with the shirt? So he's not ugly. What's wrong with the shirt? It's just saying it doesn't it it looked unkempt. It's just saying I don't really give a shit.
SPEAKER_02:Oh yeah. Like that matters. There's no effort. And I don't know if that's just a picture that they took of they chose or if that's an actual picture that he's using. Um because I'm sure it almost looked like a um a mugshot photo. Like he just got arrested.
SPEAKER_15:Right, and I'm assuming that that has to be a picture they took of when they talking to him, and he was just like, Well, I did it as a joke.
SPEAKER_02:Right, right. Cause even like his facial expression, it don't look like he's like posing for it.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah, like, oh, pick me. That's not um pick me to. I'm sure he looks different. Yeah, because he's not ugly. He's not an ugly person. He's cute, but that just ain't it. Yeah, I caught that.
SPEAKER_02:We'll delete that later. Merry Christmas. He said that on the last episode. It was still in there. We've said that on every episode. Oops. All right. That's intentional. I mean, he went through all the trouble of creating the app. Yeah, why not? Why not? Why not? No, I wonder if he charges. That'd be smart. Like, it'd be free, like for the first time.
SPEAKER_15:For the chicks to use the app. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Pays for the date right there. Pays for the date right there. He can take them out, pay for the date because he got the money from then anyway. Yeah, get out of here. But like you think about it, would you if you went and got on the app? Because think about it. Like, if I'm just on my phone and I'm like, oh, you know what? Let me go see what dating apps is out there, and I'm in the Play Store or the Apple, you know, whatever. And I find this one a singularity, and I'm like, oh, you know what? Let me see what that is. And I download it on my phone. Would I pay if I found out that all my options was only this one man? No. Unless you're desperate.
SPEAKER_15:Right. Unless you're desperate.
SPEAKER_02:I'm seeing if it's a real act. What was his name? Aaron Smith.
SPEAKER_15:He probably was up when he took it down. Why? Because he said he only did it for a joke and then it went viral.
SPEAKER_02:Oh shit. No, I just literally favorites and shit. You goddamn fast as hell.
SPEAKER_15:Let me see the the picture he put up there though.
SPEAKER_02:That's worse than the one.
SPEAKER_15:I saw a glimpse of it and I was like, wait a minute, let me see.
SPEAKER_02:Yo. He should have used a way different. Picture, like, mmm. This is my good side, bitch.
SPEAKER_15:He probably thought that's not my good side, bitch. That's crazy.
SPEAKER_02:Well, get it out you live, brother. Hopefully that works out for you.
SPEAKER_15:But I I see it. Like, I would post that picture as a joke, too.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah. He could have like just some filters or touched it up or something.
SPEAKER_15:He probably got better pictures in that. He do look like he do got that. In a dent in his forehead.
SPEAKER_02:Not a dent. I ain't heard. I heard. I thought something. I thought you said something different.
SPEAKER_15:But a dick on his forehead.
SPEAKER_14:Yeah, I might say.
SPEAKER_02:Well singularity.
SPEAKER_15:Yo.
SPEAKER_02:What's next?
SPEAKER_15:So a couple. Shut up. I always gotta clear my throat. We've been doing this for three years. God damn it. Two or three years. So anyway. What y'all think about this? A couple decided to end their lives together. After a rough life. They decided to jump off a cliff.
SPEAKER_02:Like, yo. Like that's a mean ass period. Like she be like, you bet not move. Like, what?
SPEAKER_04:She'd be like, a couple decided to kill themselves.
SPEAKER_15:Like, okay, I'm sorry. So y'all just want to read from now on? No. And with you to read. I can't. My mind moves too fast.
SPEAKER_12:I get it sometimes. No, you don't.
SPEAKER_15:So a couple decides to end their lives after a rough life. They decide to jump off a cliff. The jump bitches always talk about I talk too goddamn fast, so I'll be trying to slow the shit down. No, they're slowing down and there's pausing. The dramatic effect. Fuck y'all. Okay. Anyway, they decided to jump off a cliff. When they got to the top, they both counted to three. The man jumped, but the woman stayed. She was watching him fall for about seven seconds and then saw a parachute open. Oh so now the question is who cheated whom? Oh shit.
SPEAKER_02:Oh shit. So she didn't have a parachute, but she wasn't in a channel. He cheated her.
SPEAKER_15:I don't know if she didn't have a parachute. I think she probably Is this a real story? She probably knew. I'm gonna say he cheated her. No? Because he jumped with the thought process that she was gonna jump and he hadn't.
SPEAKER_02:Premeditated knowing he had no intentions. Whose idea was it? She could have, she could have got to the edge and at that moment made the decision like, oh shit, I'm not doing this. He went and premeditated. Or she came up with the eyes and gear. Or he she could have came up with a hey, let's go jump off a cliff together and decided not to jump just to see if he would jump.
SPEAKER_15:So I'm gonna say this, and truth be told, I honestly think they both had no intentions of killing each killing their self. I think that they went in like, bitch, I don't like you. Man, I don't like it. Oh my god. Because it says they had a rough life. Why they do that? Why even go for that? It says they have a rough life, but we don't know if it was to the point of the rough life was just the situation between them two. And instead of being adults and just walking away, they decided to jump away. So it's either who brought up the actual thing first, because if that's the case, then their intentions was, I'm gonna tell this person that I we should do this together because we love each other and life's too hard, with the intent of I'ma let them die and I'm gonna live my life happily after that. Like, if you think about it, like who who thinks that? Like, you're gonna, I'm not gonna go to my husband, like, you know what, we had a rough life. I think we should take each other's lives. That's stupid.
SPEAKER_02:A comment says, one of the comments, it says, the woman can argue that she had a change of heart last minute. God told her not to jump, etc. The man, though, that was premeditated.
SPEAKER_06:See, that's what that's fine.
SPEAKER_02:Oh my god. Yeah, one says, both of them cheated. The man brought a parachute and the woman brought common sense. The only loyal one was the mountain.
SPEAKER_04:It stayed.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. That's crazy though, right? They should have held hands and jumped together at the same time. If I was stupid enough to want to jump off a cliff, you holding my hands. Yeah, we hold it. We hold her hands. We go your parachute is now our parachute. Yeah, for real. We are going together.
SPEAKER_15:And that's why I'm saying, like, who thought process was that? Like, was it the husband trying to get rid of the wife, or was it the wife, like, I'm gonna let this food jump and I'm gonna stay back?
SPEAKER_02:But how did they watch? Somebody had to come up with the idea.
SPEAKER_15:Listen, like, could what that's what I'm saying. But the thing is too with her, why are you just watching him? Like, you're not like, oh my god, I did it, do it. Or just you ain't stopping pre-medicating. If you have like a, if you have like a, oh, I'm coming to Jesus moment, and you like, mm-hmm. Like, oh my god, baby, do it! You're like, no, we're not gonna do it, honey. And but she just goes, he goes, and she's standing there like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. I wonder how long it's gonna take for him to get to the bottom, and then the parachute comes out, she's like, holy fuck. So he had the bottom being, she saw his backpack, had a parachute in it while they was hiking up the mountain. First of all, that's the truth. Like, why? Because why would you have a backpack on? Right. You're hiking. No. Oh, if your whole entire.
SPEAKER_02:Just in case I gotta eat lunch. You make some s'mores.
SPEAKER_15:No, sir. I mean, there are you planning your death, you ain't hungry.
SPEAKER_02:I mean, it's them, so you know, you don't you don't know.
SPEAKER_15:You hungry planned your death? Who eat who think about eating?
SPEAKER_02:I mean, they do.
SPEAKER_15:Like, oh god, I'm so starving before we die. Let's hurry up and have this meal. People on death.
SPEAKER_02:That's not their choice. Things that's fighting. Why do they do what they do?
SPEAKER_15:Some people on death row.
SPEAKER_02:Eat a sandwich before they jump. Some people. Yeah, some people. Some people want lasagna and banana put and finana.
SPEAKER_15:That's because they axed. They're axed. Imagine if they're not axed, they're just dying. No, there are. They asked. And on death row, they're axed to if they want to eat. I'm saying it the nigga way. You got a problem with it, Becky. I don't know none of those. You got a problem with it, Becky. Say father.
SPEAKER_12:Father.
SPEAKER_15:Exactly.
SPEAKER_02:Anyway. Um, they're both idiots. Yeah. No, they don't. I don't know.
SPEAKER_15:No, they I don't know if they were idiots.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, at the bottom of the mountain looking up, and she down there looking down. She up there looking down, like, put their hands up, like, yeah.
SPEAKER_13:Like, you selfish set of a bitch. And he was like, bitch, you didn't jump.
SPEAKER_15:I don't think they're idiots.
SPEAKER_13:It's over.
SPEAKER_15:I think they just didn't have no trust for each other. Side eye the other, like, because whoever brought the idea up there was like, I'm gonna just go along with this shit. You wanna die, bitch? Go ahead.
SPEAKER_02:But why even go along with it? Like, why go jump? Why make it all the way to the mountain? It was it was her anxiety. She needed emotional support.
SPEAKER_15:So he was like, he probably had life insurance.
SPEAKER_02:They probably pro like on her, or he had one on himself.
SPEAKER_15:Like he had one.
SPEAKER_02:She knew about it. Oh. I thought you meant he had one out on her, and that's why he had the parachute so that when she died, no, that's what I was thinking as for her.
SPEAKER_15:That's why she stood at the top, like, mm-hmm. Yeah, but we went up there to parachute. I know.
SPEAKER_02:Cliff dive and all that. I'm gonna go down there and I'm gonna put a um a damaged parachute on her back.
SPEAKER_04:Like, I got you, babe.
SPEAKER_02:Shit got like metal logs in it. Metal logs. I don't know.
SPEAKER_15:Like, cause why is that?
SPEAKER_02:A metal log?
SPEAKER_15:Honestly, like if you come out of that whole situation, why are you telling anybody that's what y'all's gonna do? That's true.
SPEAKER_02:I don't know.
SPEAKER_15:So who went to the media?
SPEAKER_02:Now you on suicide protocol, like how the fuck this make it to like social media. They probably told somebody. He was like, I went to kill this nigga. Nah, I went to kill anyway. That's just interesting. So everybody get your rabies shots. So there was a man from Michigan who has died from rabies after receiving a kidney from a donor that unknowingly was infected. So the person. Yeah, I know. So the person receiving the kidney, he had no exposure to animals. Um, but five weeks after the transplant that he got, he developed neurological symptoms and he later died. Um the testing that they did ended up confirming that he had rabies. So after investigating, they re-examined the donor's history and learned that that donor had been scratched by a skunk, and the the family says that the skunk has showed um predatory aggression. And nobody thought to say that sooner? Look, um the fact that they had to re-examine is a problem. And they said that weeks later that donor had collapsed, was declared brain dead, and his organs were used for transplant. Idiots.
SPEAKER_15:Can you still use the no, you can't use the organs because they was contaminated.
SPEAKER_02:Say that again.
SPEAKER_15:No, I'm just like catching up. But you No, no, no, because he's the organ donor. So the person who received his stuff is the one that ended up with the rabies.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. Yeah. But the the original person that got scratched.
SPEAKER_15:Right. So his organs was infected.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, and they didn't they didn't properly fucking search or do good blood work and all that stuff.
SPEAKER_15:Okay. I mean not blood work, but Yeah, all that. A proper eye talk, sir.
SPEAKER_02:But evidently this isn't the first time that that's happened. Which is crazy. This is the fourth documented um from a rabies transmission in the same place in the US since 1970. I'm about to say from the same place.
SPEAKER_15:I don't know, somebody got some splain in the door.
SPEAKER_02:It is rare, but that's kind of crazy.
SPEAKER_15:But you know what else it is, too? It's the fact that people don't say what happened to them or go to the hospital for shit that has happened. Like you get I'm sorry, I get scratched by a skunk. I'm not gonna be like, yeah, don't say nothing, don't get no medical attention or nothing. I guess, you know, some people. How do you bleed in? You still bleeding a week later. That's an issue.
SPEAKER_02:So he had to be squared up with the skunk. It said he was protecting a kitten. That's why that's stupid shit. Fucking kitten? What is he gonna do? Eat the kitten?
SPEAKER_15:He's still a living rabbit. Okay. You don't want the kitten. The kitten is a baby.
SPEAKER_02:I don't like cats. 18,000 in litters.
SPEAKER_15:I don't like cats either, but what?
SPEAKER_02:Cats be having like litters of like 18 fucking.
SPEAKER_15:Oh, you got how many kids? Sacrifice one. You got a certain amount of kids you gonna sacrifice one?
SPEAKER_02:Sacrifice one for the for the human race. Not for the greater good. For the greater good.
SPEAKER_15:You gonna sacrifice one of yours?
SPEAKER_02:Um a kitten?
SPEAKER_15:No.
SPEAKER_02:We're talking about kittens here.
SPEAKER_15:I don't have 18,000 kids.
SPEAKER_02:Well, you do. Well, that's true. You do too. And you sacrifice a lot of it. I do rest in peace. And you never came back with ravi. I know you might wow. Wow. Wow. You're on a roll. Toasted.
SPEAKER_15:I I don't believe that you see your pet about to get attacked by another animal, and you're gonna just ignore it. Can we get past it? You nasty bitch.
SPEAKER_04:Yeah, all right, yeah, alright.
SPEAKER_02:Well, we're just saying he needs the skunk to save the kitten, and you died. That's not what I said, but I'm just saying, I'm that's my synopsis of the story.
SPEAKER_15:No, because you're a horrible person.
SPEAKER_02:He fought the skunk to save the kitten. It's not that he was fighting. He wasn't mud wrestling.
SPEAKER_15:Right. Like, he could have been like, shoo. You know how people black shoe.
SPEAKER_02:She could have gone to go like pick the kitten up off the ground and it lunged at him. Yeah, and it, yeah. Yeah. Not that he was like boxing. Yeah. He was like, put him up, put him up.
SPEAKER_15:Hold on, cat. You're not gonna save your dog from like a possum trying to attack it, a possum that possibly has rabies. A rabbit raccoon. You're not gonna go grab your dog real quick and he killed his dog before. Oh, that's true.
SPEAKER_03:The fact that I laugh and not like exactly. I did not kill my dog. I was fucking alive on Christmas. That's oh my god.
SPEAKER_02:Jesus. What? Not for you, dog killer. I did not kill no dog. Um no. I mean, my my dog wouldn't. I mean You can't say what your dog would be. Yeah. It wouldn't be outside. It would be in a fence. What? Fenced in yards. Don't climb fences? I don't know. Who don't know?
SPEAKER_15:I was coming up with some finish acid area.
SPEAKER_02:No, because I would have pre-planned the apocalypse of rabbit raccoons and they would have eaten my AI version of my dog.
SPEAKER_15:He's like, no, my drone would have flew down and picked him up. I would have been a bit safe. We all safe. Shut up.
SPEAKER_02:There's ways. Of course there are. Shoot the rabbit. The rabbit uh shoot the rabbit. Shoot the rabbit animal. So everybody got a gun? I mean, you don't want it to spread, so you you you kill the rabbit animal. And then call the um the animal, please. Not everybody knows anybody can spot a rabbit animal. Anybody believe it? If they're super aggressive, that's not how you can tell. Because some animals are just super aggressive. Well, they're getting shot.
SPEAKER_03:I thought he was rabbit.
SPEAKER_02:Well, because they gotta foam out their mouth and be shaking like a crackhead. You can tell.
SPEAKER_15:No, you can't. You can't tell.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, rabbit.
SPEAKER_15:Yes, you can.
SPEAKER_02:They don't always foam out the mouth.
SPEAKER_15:Especially if it's like the early stages of.
SPEAKER_02:They start walking in on their hind legs and beating their meat. They don't they rabbit.
SPEAKER_15:Your obsession with meat beating is crazy.
SPEAKER_02:Almost like you with Sean. When you rabbit, you just walk behind legs, foam at them off and beat. That sounds like that's something you do.
SPEAKER_05:It does sound like he was like really.
SPEAKER_04:I did it last weekend. I believe it. I believe it too. I don't think that was phone. Oh shit. And I don't think it was last week. It was yesterday.
SPEAKER_03:I don't think he had enough meat.
SPEAKER_02:Oh shit. It was a slim gym. That's nasty. I don't know if I ever asked y'all this question. Would you rather super long and skinny or super short and fat? You have. I did. Mm-hmm. You have. What was your synopsis?
SPEAKER_15:What was your what was your preference?
SPEAKER_02:If a female have they got super long nipples.
SPEAKER_03:That was good. That was quick. It was quick. I couldn't even I couldn't even respond properly. I was like, oh shit. That was good.
SPEAKER_14:Thank y'all.
SPEAKER_02:All right now. So what was it? Y'all rub it off on me. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Anyway. Yeah. That water came out your nose. That was funny. Yeah, I got on my nerves. Anyway.
SPEAKER_06:Oh shit.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, protect your pets from the rabbit animals.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah. But are you really protecting your pet?
SPEAKER_02:No.
SPEAKER_15:I didn't think so.
SPEAKER_02:I don't have a I have a fish. My fish gave rab rabbit rabies and shit. You know what? Come on now. And I was just biting the water. It's too old. Oh no.
SPEAKER_15:I can see your fish hopping out, hopping out the fucking fish.
SPEAKER_14:Fuck my girl.
SPEAKER_03:Get your goldfish out. Leave the kids in there.
SPEAKER_13:Don't the fish.
SPEAKER_02:And they wonder why he's running out with a parachute on his back.
SPEAKER_13:With a slip chip. Where's your mama?
SPEAKER_02:Follow man. Whack them all.
SPEAKER_15:Where do we go?
SPEAKER_02:Uh I don't know.
SPEAKER_14:Where where do we go?
unknown:Okay.
SPEAKER_02:Yo, we are so I tried to get it together so I could talk about this next one. Why the fuck did we go there? I don't know. Anyway, go ahead.
SPEAKER_15:Oh my God. So unhinged. So a San Jose funeral home is facing a lawsuit over an alleged and deeply disturbing mistake involving the mishandling of human remains. A father claims that after his son's death, a funeral director gave him a bag that was supposed to contain his son's clothing. When he later opened it at home, he discovered it instead contained his son's brains. How the fuck? It's often said that no parent should ever have to bury their child. For one San Jose family, that imunge imangible unimaginable grief has been compounded by what they describe as a horrifying error by a funeral home. How did you wait?
SPEAKER_02:How do you do that? You read it so perfectly and so fast, I couldn't catch up. So mustard. Relish. Um so the funeral home put the brain in a bag?
SPEAKER_15:I'm sure they probably bagged the organs that I'm assuming.
SPEAKER_02:And gave it to the parents? It was like, hey, uh It's weird.
SPEAKER_15:But penny for your thoughts. They asked for the clothes. Sir. They asked for the clothes, and the guy gave them brains. That's horrible though. Can you imagine? But what if it wasn't their son's brain? What was the plus sign? Well, they're close to his shut up.
SPEAKER_02:He was always in his thoughts. Like, I mean, he I mean, they frame anything now. I mean, they frame that that old lady in a in a um coffee table. So they could have done something with that. That was on purpose. Yeah.
SPEAKER_15:No, they didn't want their son's brains. They wanted his clothes.
SPEAKER_02:Right. That's horrible.
SPEAKER_15:So how do you mistake soft clothes with squishy bag? I'm trying to figure that out. And I know that bag had to be dripping. It's brains.
SPEAKER_02:Not dripping.
SPEAKER_15:But I'm saying it's brains. It's not like it's that's nasty.
SPEAKER_02:I was gonna go somewhere.
SPEAKER_15:I bet you was. Deep in thought. Go ahead and say it. It's bothering you. Just let it out. It does look like it's bothering me. Right? You just have to say it. Just go ahead. Let it out.
SPEAKER_02:Let it go.
SPEAKER_15:So let it go.
SPEAKER_02:I ain't got nothing. I'm just saying. That's a first. So brains in a bag. What's gonna call it bag brain? I mean.
SPEAKER_15:It wasn't a bag of bones, it was a bag of brains.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. Anyway. Did they give the brain back? Like would you keep it? I mean. I would be mortified. Yeah, I mean, that's sad. Like, how old was the kid again? That died? Yeah. The one that lived.
SPEAKER_15:Well, the one that had lived, he was um a newborn. He was 27.
SPEAKER_02:Oh. Wait, the the the brain came from the 27-year-old kid?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, he had an adult brain. That's that's crazy. Did it matter? No, I'm just I didn't know if it was adult or a child, child.
SPEAKER_15:Well, they said child because a kid is always your child. No matter how old they are, that's your child. If you look up the definition, that's your child. Yeah. Okay, don't be like Santana and don't know what the words mean. Santana?
SPEAKER_02:He likes one of them animals out in the wild that they only keep their kids around for like the first two weeks, and then it's like you on your own, get out the pack. It was developed. Like, I taught you how to fly. Goodbye.
SPEAKER_15:What does the development of the brain have to do with the fact that they handed this man?
SPEAKER_02:They shouldn't they, you know. I hope they sue. Did they sue? Did they say anything?
SPEAKER_15:It doesn't say if they sue. They won't comment. The parents, they're just they're still distraught, so they haven't commented.
SPEAKER_02:So this is recent, recent.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Oh wow. I would have screamed. How? Like, what would it sound like?
SPEAKER_15:That's how it would have came out. That was an ass whistling.
SPEAKER_02:And then it sucked back in.
SPEAKER_14:Oh my God.
SPEAKER_02:Anyways. I was trapped in my ass. What? So there's an interesting story. She got a brilliant man trapped in her ass. That is not a good thing. I believe it.
SPEAKER_15:That is dominant.
SPEAKER_02:Her husband doesn't seem to be too brave.
SPEAKER_15:I mean, if he got stuck in there.
SPEAKER_04:You gotta wait for the next wherever the wind blows.
SPEAKER_02:Get out of here. So it was an interesting story.
SPEAKER_14:It's an older story, but I just thought that just thing was just so funny.
SPEAKER_02:And there is um there's audio to it, but so there was a woman from Devon, England, Sarah Colwell, and she suffered from a severe migraine that ended up triggering what doctors call foreign accent syndrome. So when she woke up, her regular accent that she had had completely vanished, and it was replaced by what sounded like a Chinese accent, even though she had never been to China or studied the language before. Mm-hmm. So the the condition is incredibly rare. Um, it's caused by damage to the parts of the brain that control speech rhythm and tone. Um, it doesn't mean like that the person like just suddenly speaks the new language, but it just changes how their voice sounds. And for some reason, she became a Chinese woman. Um let me see, I think I got it here. They said like even like years later, her voice never went back to what it was. Oh really? Yeah, so I think she had to end it up getting like dual citizenship.
SPEAKER_15:Somebody was at her door, she's like, Why mean it? Sarah, hero.
SPEAKER_10:And now it speaks with a permanent Chinese accent.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, well, you're not because yeah, I just think that's crazy.
SPEAKER_07:And now it speaks with a permanent Chinese accent. It wasn't until I was in the ambulance on the way to have the dog until he said, You're aware of the way you have to be there. No, you sound like you can work in a Chinese writer.
SPEAKER_03:Robota Robota You know, I think that's hilarious.
SPEAKER_02:It's not funny, but it's funny. Like, can you imagine?
SPEAKER_09:That's what she sounded like.
SPEAKER_02:O'Clocky O'Clocky. That's what she sounded like now.
SPEAKER_14:Why is he like this? Hello.
SPEAKER_02:And she's all the way white.
SPEAKER_14:She's yeah, she's British.
SPEAKER_04:British? Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_02:All the original whites. And she had she had her her she had her normal accent from over there. Um and now she's multicultural.
unknown:Oh God.
SPEAKER_02:When she ordered Chinese food, they make her feel better because she's ten extra minutes.
SPEAKER_15:They both go back and forth. Hurrow, hello, hello, hello. I turn left now. Um yeah, okay. It's horrible. This is wild.
SPEAKER_02:That's horrible. Yeah. Hey.
SPEAKER_13:Welcome to the table, ladies and gentlemen.
SPEAKER_02:Um refer to the time at the beginning of the show. Most of this is not gonna make it, so I thank God.
SPEAKER_15:Okay, what's next on the dock? Well, when you have parents who are sick and tired of their children not acting right and decide to put their foot down on certain situations, but it backfires. Is it on the parents or how it happened? So I'm gonna read the story. Liam Ashley was just 17. When his parents made a decision they thought would scare him straight. After a string of minor offenses and using their van without permission, they denied him bail, believing a short stay in custody would teach him a lesson. Instead, he was locked inside a cramped prison van compartment with a violent adult offender who never should have been near a teenager. The door shut, the van pulled away, and Liam was trapped in the dark cuff, in the dark cuff with a mentally unstable man capable of killing. Somewhere along the highway, the inmate launched a brutal attack, strangling and stomping Liam while shouting, F and die. This guy is taking ages to die. By the time the vehicle stopped and the guards rushed to open the door, he was barely clinging to life. He passed the next day. Was what was meant to scare him straight only showed how dangerously broken the system was, and Liam ended up paying with his life.
SPEAKER_02:Bet you ain't won't steal another van. He can't. Without permission.
SPEAKER_15:He can't.
SPEAKER_02:I know.
unknown:That's sad.
SPEAKER_15:So what do you think about that?
SPEAKER_02:Like, as a parent, I can see why they did it because they were trying to teach him a lesson. So they can't control how the the officers and who they put the boy with. True. They should have some kind of mindful of, you know, a minor with a whatever. But police officers and police officers and and police officers and what they do. I was gonna say police officers and police officers and what they do. That shit doesn't make sense. What they do don't make no fucking sense.
SPEAKER_15:I don't think these are police officers, though. These is like like correctional officers. They were in transport. So he was already booked. So they didn't make bells, so I'm assuming he was on his way to go to jail. Yeah. I mean, you you what you want to do? Well, actually, nope, that's wrong. He probably was with like cops bringing him to the institution. Yeah, so I'm saying, like So they I if if you can't if they came from the jail same jail to the same place.
SPEAKER_02:If he's 17, then he should be tried as a minor, right? That depends on how they try you for the type of crime.
SPEAKER_15:They it doesn't matter. If they try we're gonna try you as an adult, you're an adult.
SPEAKER_02:Well then, hey, uh I the parent the parent was trying to to to make a statement. Like, listen, this is where you're gonna end up if you keep doing this stupid shit that you're doing.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah, I don't fault the parents. I I don't either. I don't I don't technically fault the parents. It's the system because it could have been their last straw, but yeah, I blame the system for it.
SPEAKER_02:It's the system. Yeah, you put them in there, and it's the kid. Hey, stop doing the things you're doing, you're gonna find yourself in a predicament where you don't you don't like it. And unfortunately, he was in the last predicament he was gonna be in. So I mean, which what can you do? Right. I know the kid the parents is gonna feel guilty because it was like it was our idea to kind of let him go, but like wow, we could have just grounded him. But yeah, yeah, but but at the same time, does grounding work if you try to ground him over and over and over again?
SPEAKER_15:Especially if this was But from what I'm hearing, like the offense that happened caused him to get arrested in the first place, and they decided, well, we're not making your bell this time. And it's like this time, it's like so he he was pushing the boundaries.
SPEAKER_02:So he he didn't care, the kid didn't care where he ended up, he was just gonna do what the fuck he wanted to do in the first place. So it's the cave got put where he was supposed to be, where he was aiming to go. So you aim to go there, you're there, and unfortunately. The system failed you.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:So I I mean, grounding him at this point is like I I can still ground you, but at some point at some point, right? Six feet. Um, but at some point he was gonna find himself in somebody's jail and somebody's gonna beat the shit out of him anyway. So either way, it just sucks that now the parents gotta live with this guilt saying, Oh, I was trying to teach him a lesson. But if this isn't the first time, then obviously there's something more going on wrong. Yeah. So like maybe try some other help for your child. Yeah.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah, why be like, oh, you're gonna go to jail and face it back and get him some psychological help.
SPEAKER_02:Or maybe they tried all the options. I mean, he's 17, so 17 years old. No, son. Still a minor. Yeah, I'm saying, like, maybe they maybe they tried therapy, they tried all these other options. Shock therapy. He got shocked, all right. Uh no, he didn't. Yeah, with a boot. You know what? Oh, they they they wasn't wearing boots, so it's probably just toes and bunions. Yo, get out of here. But I mean Why don't even ask. Don't I feel sorry for the kid? I mean, he shouldn't. I do too. I mean, but I feel sorry. You gotta make parents because that's the situation. That's the fact that you gotta make better choices. I I I hate that. Like my my youngest son is was a menace when he was young. And I was just like, yo, you're gonna find like I at first I was like, I'm gonna bring you to like my idea was I was gonna bring you to a police officer station just to see what the fuck goes on. It's like you don't wanna be here. So I walked them in and I I walked right about, turned right back around. I was like, nah, this is not how I'm gonna I'm not gonna show you this shit. Because then they they started asking, what's your name, kid? And like, you know what? You don't need to ask me anything. I I just turn right around. But I was like, listen, that's that's where bad people go. You don't want to go there. Yeah, and they don't you don't get the freedom that you you think you want to have. So it's like I was trying to teach him just to just show him like you don't want to end up there. Yeah, yeah. I mean, he was still pushing the boundaries and shit, but I think once he matured to a degree, I mean he's only he's about to be 15 right now. So it's like he's matured, he found other things to keep his attention. He's not doing the the same things when he was younger because he didn't know no better. So it's like you just kind of keep teaching and learning and guiding and guiding and guiding, and it's like hopefully something would catch. Yeah. So I mean, yeah. I wanna sometimes it never catches, it just never catches you got Jeffrey Dama, you got, you know what I mean, like everything. So I got a question. Yeah. Mr. If the cops told you that your wife had been arrested, what would you instantly assume she did? If my if my wife said what now? If the cops told you you were your wife was arrested, what would you instantly assume she did? Back on that corner.
SPEAKER_15:Back on the your wife was a prostitute?
SPEAKER_02:That's where he found her. No, I'm just playing. Um That's crazy. Boosting. Boosting. Your wife's a thief. I got a lot of clothes, though. I never asked where they came from. That's crazy. For a fact. Back then, I was like fucked up. I was like, I'm a nice girl. Keep doing what you do. No, no, I'm just gonna have no idea. I I would think she would probably either she got fed up and killed somebody because I know her temperament, or or something minor. Yeah. Because it won't tell you the degree of why she got arrested. It's probably something she probably riding dirty in her car. They have registration. Oh my god. No She started fighting the police. Yeah. Fuck you! All right, let me go get her. Nene, if they came about your husband, what would you assume he did?
SPEAKER_15:His fucking temper. Yeah. Mm hmm. He beat the shit out of somebody. That's the only thing I could think of. Yeah. Yeah, it wouldn't be nothing else.
SPEAKER_02:You? What? You? I don't know no cops.
SPEAKER_06:Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Now what would you what would you do? You wouldn't get caught. You're going back in. Oh shit.
SPEAKER_03:Oh my God.
SPEAKER_02:Anyway. Oh shit. That's it. That's all we got.
SPEAKER_14:Oh no.
SPEAKER_15:Um, that was a story. Sorry. Never mind.
SPEAKER_14:Now it's audio and your thing ain't working right now. Um your thing.
SPEAKER_15:I just realized whoa. So um bringing it back to like so y'all know Japanese all-processed uh food and all-processed food in school over in Japan. Something I think that America should be doing.
SPEAKER_02:Um we ain't gonna do anything that smart.
SPEAKER_15:They don't give a shit about the damn kids. So every meal is cooked fresh each morning for these kids. Um, visitors walk through schools of a thousand kids and see zero OB students. Japan doesn't just serve lunch. Every meal is cooked fresh that morning, made from scratch on site, zero processed ingredients, balanced nutrition by law. No vending machines, no fast food contracts, no corporate sponsors, just real food for growing brains. American school lunch is a business model. Japan is a cultural priority. U.S. schools sign contracts with Sodexo, uh, Aramark, and Tyson Foods. They serve frozen, reheated, chemical-loaded meals designed for profit, not health. That's crazy. It's true, though. It's true.
SPEAKER_02:It's very true.
SPEAKER_15:Childhood obesity in America, 19.7%. Childhood obesity in Japan, 3.5%. Those are just the sumo wrestlers.
SPEAKER_02:Now they just gotta eat something to help them drive.
SPEAKER_15:You was waiting for that that racist moment.
SPEAKER_02:They say the most important meal of the day is breakfast, right?
SPEAKER_13:It helps black people do. That's black in.
SPEAKER_15:It helps. Yeah, we're gonna move on. So here's what here's what Japanese students eat daily cabbage. Fresh fish or chicken. Rice. Yeah, kimchi, yeah. Seasonal vegetables. I think that's is that Japanese? I thought that was Korean. They eat rice for breakfast. Kimchi's Korean, I think. Look at you know your Asian foods. My mom. Um, fresh or chicken. Oh yeah. Vegetables, miso soup made that morning. Rice. I like miso soup. Not bread loaded with preservatives, fruit, and milk from local farms. American kids, we eat chicken nuggets, mechanically separated pizza classified as a vegetable by Congress. Chocolate milk, more sugar than soda. Like, what are we doing? Is that chocolate milk got more sugar than soda? Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Wow. They classify pizza as a fruit group. So much tomato sauce on there. Right. What though? They classified as a fucking vegetable. The doughy fruit. Everybody ran along with it. You know how many teachers got the little calendar of the food groups?
SPEAKER_15:So listen, what's crazy about it, right? Is they're like, oh, tomato is a vegetable. So they classified it as a vegetable because I'm thinking it has to be because of the tomato sauce, right? Technically, tomato is not a vegetable, it's a fruit. So conjugate, congregus. I'm Asian conjugris. She ate too many chicken nuts.
SPEAKER_06:Yo, it's our school system.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, I mean, listen, listen to me. I ain't got no common sense.
SPEAKER_14:Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:It is crazy because when you think about like the stuff that like the FDA passes through, like everything we have is dyed. All of them, like red dye number five, and like all of them different. Like, they be finding like that some of this stuff is like made with like chemicals that like make rubber and like all kinds of craziness.
SPEAKER_15:Like, look at they tray. That looks delicious. Well compared to, of course, a shitty food gonna look good because they need you to eat the shitty food. Yeah, I eat that. Yeah, so I'm saying that fish.
SPEAKER_02:That look like that. That's chicken. Oh, that looked good. I could survive in a Japanese school. Mm-hmm. I bet you could. That is absolutely horrible. I'ma be the three percent obese child.
SPEAKER_15:I'm like, I need another meal.
SPEAKER_02:That'll get you right quick.
SPEAKER_15:Hurrow. I done needed uh the more miso soup, please.
SPEAKER_02:That's absolutely horrible. We are no, not on Christmas Day.
SPEAKER_15:Merry Christmas. It's Miss Time. Oh my god. Okay, I'm sorry, that's horrible. Bleep that shit. Bleepin' piggy. He don't know where's that.
SPEAKER_02:I know.
SPEAKER_15:He never does.
unknown:Oh my god.
SPEAKER_15:You know, we just look ahead. It's it's the gems. Just go to the gems. Hurry, the gems, please.
SPEAKER_11:Right. And hip hop is this.
SPEAKER_15:Oh, my one, two. Nah. The way they go.
SPEAKER_11:Jeminty.
SPEAKER_02:Jiminty. Jimamas.
SPEAKER_14:I'm done. I'm absolutely done.
SPEAKER_02:Thank you. Okay, gem number one. I I found this very fucking hilarious. Please don't have anything Asian in it. It says, I'm not arguing with no bitch with pussy lips that hang like balls.
SPEAKER_15:That's disgusting.
SPEAKER_02:Who has How would you know they hang like balls though? Because he fucked with them. Yeah.
SPEAKER_15:Probably like them.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, you know what I'm saying? What's some dogs that be slobbering with the thing on the um basset hounds that be drooling all?
SPEAKER_15:Now the American bulldogs? They drool.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_14:If your pussy looks like a never no bitch. Just dragon. Absolutely not.
SPEAKER_02:You got a curtain over your baby hole. A curtain? Did you say a curtain? Yeah, the extra meat.
SPEAKER_15:Yo, that's disgusting.
SPEAKER_02:Yo. Alright, listen. Because it's Christmas, I found it's pretty, pretty hilarious. Did you? December 24th is Christmas Eve. December 25th is Christmas Day. December 26th? Yep, question mark. We don't even know what that is. December 27th through the 30th, the void, no one knows what day it is. Then you got New Year's Eve, New Year's Day, and then reality sets in.
SPEAKER_15:Who cares?
SPEAKER_02:Like after Christmas, nobody pays attention to New York. Nobody cares about it. Until after New Year's.
SPEAKER_15:Well, he wanted it to be Black Friday, like um, explain that to me.
SPEAKER_02:I don't know. That's it. Like, it's kinda. It's like after Christmas Day, nobody gives a fuck what day it is. I think we don't start paying attention until January comes out. Oh, sorry about you guys.
SPEAKER_15:Oh, you do? Mm-hmm. Oh. I'm not on vacation until the 31st. Oh, really? Mm-hmm. Okay. Oh. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Poor thing.
SPEAKER_15:Welp? Yeah. Damn. I thought about it, but then I was like, ain't nobody gonna be there. Yeah. There's three people in the building. Ain't nobody gonna be there.
SPEAKER_02:Should be a nice one.
SPEAKER_15:So I'm good. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Alright, last gym, and this is a question. It's just a question. Uh, women that's five five and shorter, do the sun visor even work for you in the car? No. How tall are you, Nini? Five five.
SPEAKER_15:Really? It doesn't, because every time I flip it and the sun is still there, and my husband looks over, he'd be like, you know, there's a button to lift the seat. But why do I gotta lift the seat? I just want the sun to get out my face. I don't want to do all that extra shit. So it is it is disturbing.
SPEAKER_02:You should like sit on phone books. Your phone? You should hit a car seat. That's back seat. Back when cars didn't have seat belts. Uh that's why I referenced it with Nene. You were there.
SPEAKER_15:And you know what your ass? You heard me? And you know what car. Just prayers and wishes. Okay. But that was my jumps.
SPEAKER_11:That's a sheet back in the house once again.
SPEAKER_02:I ain't got it like that. Back in the day.
SPEAKER_15:He said that all the time. What you say? What?
SPEAKER_14:I'll hear it back later.
SPEAKER_02:Alright. I have some sad news. I have to um I have to say.
SPEAKER_07:You suck.
SPEAKER_02:Just give me a moment, y'all. You lost your virginity? No, just it's it's serious. No, no, it's a serious moment. He sold it on that app, Singularity.
SPEAKER_15:That's why his his picture was like that on the app. Oh, you said a sad moment? Yes, it's a moment of silence.
SPEAKER_02:I lost my fantasy. I am not in the runnings in my playoffs. I lost my in my first week for the first time in many, many years. Nene, are you still in the game?
SPEAKER_13:I'm still in the game.
SPEAKER_02:And I wanted to say, congratulations, Nene. Um, you are in the running to get to the championships. You got two weeks left. My team decided not to fucking show up. And so plenty for and then last week, in this playoff, my team goes the fuck off. Really? And I'm like playing for fifth, fifth place. Nobody cares about fifth place. So, congratulations, Nene. I hope you uh I hope you take it for, I guess I think you're playing against your son this uh I got a player playing right now. Playing against your son this week.
SPEAKER_15:Um I am playing against my son right, and I am showing to beat him by the repoints. Really? Yes, but that could change.
SPEAKER_02:That could change. The projections don't mean shit. Yeah, they don't. Um, so uh and he's been talking hella shit this year.
SPEAKER_15:He's even been trying to convince me. He'd be like, oh mommy, you should you should put this person in and take this person out. And I'm like, sit your ass down, dude. I look like I was born yesterday, I gave birth to you.
SPEAKER_02:So you you uh if you get past this round, you'll be in the championship. Wow. Good luck. And she's been the last couple years, I've been done it. The determination on the food. Oh my god. So she is right there and it's level.
SPEAKER_15:And the crazy part is what you just say the commissioner. And last year I lost because of my son.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_15:Oh, really? Because that fool beat me by like 0.6 points.
SPEAKER_02:And then I end up and then I end up beating him and winning the championship. So for me to end up in fifth place this year, I'm pretty pissed. But it's it's it's fun because shit. Yeah. But you know, my team didn't show up. But the the fun thing is the last place loser in our in our fantasy league gets a nut set trophy. I can't wait to present him with a nut set trophy. And the winner of ours gets a trophy and 200 bucks.
SPEAKER_15:So nice, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Good luck. Good luck, Nene. I'm rooting for you. Yeah, yeah. What you want to do with your nut trophy, mister? I'm not in 10th place, so that's going to be fire. But it's funny. It looked like a real flesh of nuts. Really? Oh, yeah, it's funny.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah, this this year's fantasy was very fun.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_15:It's a lot of my uh son's friends in it, and these kids are hilarious. Yeah. With the amount of shit that they talk. The best year ever. It's fun. And my daughter, my daughter's in it too. And let me tell you, this chick has been holding what she's number one. She's the first place. Yeah. In her first year. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:So she's probably gonna take it.
SPEAKER_15:Well, she's playing. She's been flopping around, but she's still. She lost the last two weeks.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. And whoever she's playing against this week, um, the projections don't look good for her.
SPEAKER_15:But she's been holding it down. Yeah, if she does some changes, maybe, but like, I'm like, first place is crazy. And I mean, all the weeks that pass. This is like how many weeks? And she might not make it. 14, 15 weeks right now.
SPEAKER_02:It's the 15th week. So we got one more.
SPEAKER_15:I mean, has she been holding number one spot?
SPEAKER_02:Oh no, this is week 16. I did give her her first L though. I did. Yeah, she's nine and she's 10 and 4. She goes against um uh one of Jordan's friends who's eight and six, who ended up beating me last week to get take me out of the championship uh run. And then uh your son is 10 and 4, and then you are 7-7. So, and she's the the last team that just barely makes it to the playoffs. And she just I just be holding on, man.
SPEAKER_15:So that's that.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, good luck.
SPEAKER_15:Yeah, sorry, mister.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, it it is what it is, it is what it is. It is what it is. Finally, he got knocked out. I know, right? I know. Welp.
SPEAKER_15:Well, I hope you guys have a very very good happy chair. Merry Christmas, happy Kwanzaa, happy Hanukkah. Whatever you whatever you celebrate holidays, guys.
SPEAKER_02:Sean says let us know.
SPEAKER_01:Let us know, let us know. Man, it doesn't show signs. Let us know. Let us when we finally kiss good night. But if you really hold it all the way home, I'll be walking, and the fire is slowly dying, and my dear, we're still goodbye. But as long as you love me so, let it snow, let all let all let all let all let all let all let all
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